Fragments of Memories
by AznSage
Summary: Some things just take more than one lifetime to accomplish. Lifetimes that Goku has to wait for. Goku POV [Sanzo/Goku][Hakkai/Gojyo]
1. Prologue

  
Title: Fragments of Memories   
Author: AznSage   
Disclaimer: Don't own, don't sue.   
Pairings: Sanzo/Goku, Hakkai/Gojyo   
Archived: FF.net, Still Time (gmsaiyuki.topcities.com). If you wanna archive, ask and it's always a yes.   
Rating: PG-13   
Note: Goku POV. This can get very confusing very fast, so if there's anything you wanna ask, you can e-mail me. The fic starts off in 664, the actual year that the real Sanzo died. Yeah I know that screws up the rest of his years, but big whoop. I didn't really want Sanzo to die at only 62, so I took a bit of artistic license here. 

We all knew this would happen sooner or later, but when the moment actually hits you, you can never be prepared enough for it. 

"Ne...Goku...I'm gonna be outside with Hakkai. I'll give you a few minutes alone with him, but after that, we have to put him to rest." Gojyo took another puff on his cigarette before leaving the room silently, allowing me some quiet with _him_, some time to say my final goodbyes. 

"Sanzo...I..." I couldn't bring myself to say anything. There were no words which could sum up everything we've been through. There was just too much that was left hanging in the air though. I brushed the blond locks away from his face, using a towel to dab off the moisture still on his skin. The heat of the air did nothing to him, he was still calm, still serene, still dead. A part of me wished that he would just jump back up to life and hold me and say what I wanted to hear, but that would be selfish of me. It was his time to go and I had no way of stopping him. 

On this day, Genjo Sanzo had passed on to the next world, rejoining the rest of the mortal souls that had outlived their life energy in the cycle of reincarnation. Cause of death? Old age. 

I think maybe that was what hurt me the most. Because it was all part of a natural cycle and I had no power to stop it in anyway, no way to protect him in anyway. It had pained me to have to see him getting progressively weaker every passing moment while I still retained my vitality and my youth. It pained me even more when he had shoved me away and said that he didn't need me to help. 

But he was gone now. And there was nothing I could do about it. There was nothing I could say to him. Because dead people don't say things back. 

I left the room quietly, the smell of the burning incense teasing my senses. Gojyo and Hakkai were waiting for me on the steps of the temple, sitting calmly as if nothing happened. Their two heads swiveled back to look at me at the same time, glancing at me only momentarily before getting up quickly and towards the jeep. Behind me, a monk approached me and handed me a pack with the few things that could be called Sanzo's worldy possessions. Taking it and then thanking him, I made my way over to my remaining companions. We would return again anyway. Tomorrow, they were going to cremate Sanzo and we were coming, welcomed or not. 

Piling into the jeep and setting down the pack gently next to me, I sighed deeply. Gojyo had taken Sanzo's spot in front of me. But what's lost is lost. 

I stared out into space while Hakkai began to drive back to the inn that we were going to stay at before we returned to Hakkai and Gojyo's place. Which would now also be my home. 

The three of us had not grown older by much in the last seventy or so years. We were youkai, unaging, unchanging. Hakkai still looked like his handsome twenty-two year old self, but we had decided that every fifty years should be considered an aging for us. So technically, we called Hakkai twenty-three now. I still looked the same, growing only a little bit over the years, still the youngest, still the most childish, but my hunger had died down and evened out by now. Gojyo was the same as well, but we didn't know if his human blood would affect his aging at all. It probably wouldn't since he still was the way he was when I had first met him. 

We pulled up to the inn and Hakuryuu turned back into his dragon form. The three of us made our way up the stairs towards our room, each of us with a grim expression on our faces. Placing the pack carefully on the floor, I then proceeded to flop on the bed, not even glancing to see what was going on around me. There was nothing left of interest anyway. 

"Goku..." 

"I just need to be alone for a while, okay?" I jumped and went into the bathroom, locking it soundly behind me. I think even Gojyo knew that it would not be wise to bother me. 

Climbing into the shower, I turned it on and sat under the spray. I would not lie to myself. I do admit to the fact that I was crying. The emotions were just all backlashing right now and I couldn't take it. Hopefully, the noise from the faucet did overlap the noise I was making; I don't really want to worry Hakkai any further than I did already. 

But the water just stopped suddenly. No one had come into the bathroom, there was no way they could have gotten in without me noticing. I peered cautiously around me, whirring my head around to see clearly. The figure of one smirking Bodhisattva greeted me and I scowled. 

"What do you want?" 

"Goku, let me ask you something." 

"What?" 

"Sanzo is a mortal correct?" 

"Yes." 

"But yet Sanzo was reborn last time correct?" 

"From what I know, yes." 

"So don't you think that he'd be reborn again, silly child?" 

That most certainly got my attention. "Are you serious?" 

"I'll be the one asking the questions here. And yes. Every five hundred years. Can you wait that long for your sun, Goku?" She brought my face close and stared me down, grinning slyly at me like a cat about to catch a mouse. 

"I'll wait for all eternity if I have to."   
-TBC-   
  
Notes in Part I. 


	2. Part I

  
Title: Fragments of Memories   
Author: AznSage   
Disclaimer: Don't own, don't sue.   
Pairings: Sanzo/Goku, Hakkai/Gojyo   
Rating: PG-13   
Note: Goku POV. The actual fic takes place in the present, the years do add up correctly and I'm pretty sure it's historically accurate. The Mongol invasions to China began in 1200 so that year is not wrong. They completely succeeded in 1241 though, so the Song dynasty did not fall yet (which is why the history books will have a different year for the rise of the Yuan dynasty). Anyway, this note won't make any sense until you read, so just ignore this for now. ^^;; 

The current world population is at around six billion. And yet I'm trying to find one man. It'll be nearly impossible but since fate and destiny always bring the four of us together, I'm sure it will do so again. 

I walked off the bus with Hakkai, each of us carrying a pack for the long hike up the mountain. The sun was hot and the air was humid but we were here anyway. Here to visit our old friend Sha Gojyo. Gojyo had died about twenty five years ago in a car accident. He had still looked very young, but signs of aging had started to show. I guess the human blood in him had started to win over the youkai blood. Hakkai had mourned for half a year until he finally snapped out of it and decided to get on with life. To live because Gojyo would be reborn and they would find each other again. 

Which brings us back to now with the two of us carrying packs up to Gojyo's grave to clean it and then do a bit of praying. Hakkai had become a Buddhist, even though he knew that clean living wasn't necessary in sustaining his longevity. 

As he began the annual ritual, I stood off to the side. I had no right to barge in on Hakkai's time with Gojyo. It was hot and neither one of us wanted to stay too long or we'd get a heat stroke. I closed my eyes to wait, unable to take the glare of the sun anymore. But as I closed it, images began to flash in front of me. 

There was Sanzo during his first reincarnation, dying. There I was screaming again. There was Hakkai and Gojyo, holding me back. We had found Sanzo in the royal palace in Hangzhou as a general and we had made our way up the ranks to become generals ourselves. We astounded the public with our feats and the four of us were unstoppable. Eventually, the emperor realized that we did not age at all since he was getting old but yet we were still filled with our youth. When he died and his son came to power, we still maintained our titles in order to protect the emperor and stay together. However, upon the Mongol attack in 1200, Sanzo died in battle. We could not disturb human progress and it was time to move on. The survivors of the dynasty would think we died in battle and the Mongols had never seen our faces before so we were safe. We moved east after that to Shanghai. I had grieved for a good year after that. Because in this life, I had yet again failed to tell Sanzo how I felt. 

Another five hundred years dragged by slowly after that. We had moved around so many parts of China that I had almost lost track of the year and date until I saw Sanzo in Szechuan province. He was a simple farmer there and lacked the sharp tongues of his previous lives. He still maintained his solitude though and had no family there. We had stayed with him, at first against his will, but he had grown attached to us, just like he did in every lifetime. The years passed and the one day that we loathed came. Sanzo died once again of old age when he was eighty. Except this time I don't really know what happened, but I snapped. I had to watch Sanzo die three times, each in which I could not do anything. Heaven had heard my cries and Kanzeon descended upon us once again. It was too painful. Each lifetime, I had failed in my task and Sanzo did not look at me as anything but a brother. Kanzeon took pity on me and said that Sanzo would be reborn sooner this time to shortern my suffering. How much shorter though, she never said. 

When the Japanese had invaded China previous to World War II, the three of us escaped to Hong Kong. Another new life to establish, but it had been good to us so far. It had almost been a hundred and seventy years then and there were no signs of Sanzo. Fate had always brought him to us or us to him so this lifetime wouldn't be any different. Of course, Gojyo's death had not been at all expected. But when Hakkai asked Kanzeon, she had explained to him that since Gojyo was not like Sanzo, a being who needed to have the purity of a few lifetimes, Gojyo would be reborn. If my count was not wrong, The Gojyo that we would be looking for would be around twenty four years old. And now it was two hundred years and yet I still had no way of knowing if Sanzo was alive yet or not. 

"Ne...Goku." I snapped my eyes open in surprise and found Hakkai there waving hand in front of me. "It's time to go." He smiled at me, knowing of who I had been thinking of, but being kindly enough not to mention it but only grab his pack and start to walk. 

"Ah...coming." I grabbed my pack and followed after him, taking the chance to also grab a bottle of water out of my backpack. "Hakkai..." 

"Yes?" 

"Do you think that we'll see them again?" 

"Of course we will. It's fate." 

I nodded and followed Hakkai back to the boarding station of the bus. We were going to head back into the city and just rest today. We _had_ gotten the day off for a reason. 

Taking a seat in the back, Hakkai smiled at me before curling up towards the window for a nap. His job must have exhausted him so it was no big deal. He knew I'd wake him up when we got there. I took out my manga and was about to just read on the way back. But when I lifted my head, I saw the most beautiful sight in the world. Golden hair like the sun and stormy violet eyes. There was no other like him. 

I began to shake Hakkai to make him wake up. Slowly he stirred and flashed me a look of concern. "What's wrong, Goku?" 

"Sanzo's here! Look!" I pointed to the front of the bus but he was already gone. I looked in confusion, he was here a second ago though... 

"Goku, maybe you're just seeing things." 

I sighed. Maybe I am...   
-TBC-   
  
This fic has been asking to be written since.....about three months. The outline's pretty sketchy, but it's done. My curiousity towards the idea of youkai immortality brought this idea. They only die when they're killed and but they maintain their youth because of youjutsu. Which means that I might bring Kou-tachi into this. Er...anyway, it takes place in Hong Kong (my hometown) now, so there might be a few mentionings of a certain respiratory virus in the fic too. Well, until next time then ^^ Feedback is welcomed ^_^ 


	3. Part II

Title: Fragments of Memories   
Author: AznSage   
Disclaimer: Don't own, don't sue.   
Pairings: Sanzo/Goku, Hakkai/Gojyo   
Rating: PG-13   
Note: Wow. I should really put this fic off hiatus. So yeah. Goku POV. Takes place in Hong Kong in 2003. 

In a little under an hour, we had reached the last stop of the bus and arrived at a station at the first level of a garage. The huge lot loomed in silence, despite all the rumbling of buses moving to and fro the station and the people bustling about to get on the right line. The bus driver began to pull us in from the road outside to the dropoff point and I shook Hakkai awake, smoothly standing and grabbing my pack in the same moment. He registered the familiar environments quickly and stood to leave as well. When the bus finally pulled to a stop, we started towards the door to get off. 

"Ah! Goku! I think I left the water bottle on the seat, I'll catch up with you in a minute." He proceeded to go back to our previous seat in the back as I nodded absently at him and continued towards the door. 

When passing the stairs to the second level of the double decker, I thought I had faintly saw the shimmer of golden hair that was so familiar. Closing my eyes, I shook my head a little and looked again. Whoever it was wasn't there anymore. I probably really was seeing things. 

"Hey, are you going to move some time today or do I have to shove you off the bus?" 

"Oh! Sorry! Sorry!" Eh, how embarrassing, spacing out like that. As we got off, I turned around to apologize again to the man when I suddenly who I had been talking to. 

"Kid, what are you looking at?" I had to admit, I probably looked like a fish at that moment, mouth opening and closing in the same 'O' shape again and again. 

But then again, who wouldn't when they saw Sanzo? 

"Ah…uhh, sorry about that." I mumbled, though for which incident, I was unsure. "I thought I saw someone I knew is all." 

He grunted in that non-commital way that was so much like the him that I knew and began to walk off. "Next time, don't do it when there are so many people behind you waiting to get off. Just get off the bus first and then see if he comes off." 

"Ah…yeah." Okay, dropping head in embarrassment now… 

"Ne, Goku?" 

"Waaaah~!" I think I almost jumped there. Hakkai could just really come out of nowhere. Or I had really spaced out pretty badly back there. "Damnit Hakkai! Are you *trying* to give me a heart attack?!" 

"Sorry," He scratched the back of his head apologetically. "But you really spaced out back there. Something the matter?" 

I nodded solemnly at him. "I saw Sanzo. As in he's real. As in he's here. On Earth. Earlier than he was supposed to be, just like Kanzeon promised. And don't tell me I'm seeing things because he spoke to me and I spoke to him!" 

"Oh! So he recognized you?" 

"Well…not exactly…" I dropped my head and poked my fingers at each other in shame. "I kinda wasn't moving along to get off the bus and he kinda told me off." 

"Ah, how Sanzo-like." 

"Hey! Wait a minute! He called me 'kid!' I'll show him who's a 'kid!' I'm so much older than him now and he has the gall to call me a 'kid?!' How rude!" 

"Well, it's not like we go around announcing our real ages to people…and you do look quite young all the time. Everyone at the office says that." 

"Oh shush. Whose side are you on anyway?" I playfully punched his shoulder and we left the parking lot in higher spirits. It was well in the afternoon then and we decided that it would be a good idea to grab a lunch that we didn't have before anyway. Going to the restaurants with our packs would not necessarily be a good idea, so we decided to take the subway back and drop our stuff off before eating. We'd normally just cook dinner ourselves but the short trip today made it a bit impossible for us to do grocery shopping. 

Our place was a simple one, just like any other apartment—small but sufficient for the two of us. It's not like we spent an extremely large amount of time in there anyway. Our routine for weekdays was go to the office and work, then go home and cook some dinner, hang out there with each other. Though, more often than not, the evening ended up being us hanging out with our co-workers. The door of the apartment opened into the small living room, branching out on opposite sides. Left of the door was the bathroom, kitchen, and minute dining room. Right of the door were our two bedrooms, placed across the hall from each other, each an exact replica of the other, except that Hakkai's was much cleaner than mine. In our living room, there was a door by the window that led to the outer balcony, which had a clear view of the city. We weren't exactly by the bay, but you could see a lot of the busy and crowded areas from there all the time. Besides, if you looked far enough, you could see all the way to the island, where the boats and lights were constantly flashing on and off. By the window, there was a small table which adorned a small Kanzeon statue and a large vase of bamboo. A small glass replica of plums on a varnished wooden platter stood before her, with two pictures adjacent to either side of it: that of Sanzo and that of Gojyo. The multimedia set was next to the table, with the coaches forming a perpendicular angle by the wall across from it, the shorter one dividing the door from the living room. 

We opened the door and I vaulted over the shorter coach, stretching lazily on it as I waited for Hakkai to finish in the bathroom before leaving. So Sanzo really was here. Perhaps this meant that I could finally tell him what I wanted to. Though, to be honest, I was curious of how we were going to meet this time. Circumstances here would be a bit odd since our lives were so busy and ordinary. And it wasn't like when he was a farmer and we were some of the only people around. His life now could be so much more complex than I could ever imagine and I would never know it. And what of his family? I wouldn't want to shatter everything that we have just for myself. It would be too selfish. 

"Okay, Goku. I'm ready to go. You?" 

"Un. Yeah. Sure." I hopped up from my place and smiled at him, hoping that it would hide what I was thinking. "Lemme go grab my coat." 

Hakkai nodded at me, but as I turned to go, he placed a gentle hand on my shoulder and spoke. "You know it's alright to feel a bit anxious about this, but don't kill yourself over it. I know it's a once-in-a-lifetime chance, but we live forever, don't we? Just calm yourself and fate will run its course." 

I smiled at him again, this time sincerely. I love how Hakkai is always able to read my thoughts. Though, that might be since we've been living together for far too long. 

"Then I wish you luck with Gojyo too. The incident was…unfortunate." 

He nodded sadly at me, but tried to cheer up quickly afterwards, making me immediately regret having mentioned it. "That's alright. Gojyo is human, he should be reborn soon." He quickly flung his jacket on and opened the door, motioning for me to go. "It's nothing to worry about, what will happen, will happen." 

We went to a Western restaurant, waiting patiently to be seated. The place had been opened up recently and was the sort that had a bar by it. The seater took us to a spot near the kitchen, a bit off to the side of the restaurant, handing us our menus and then smiling politely, noting that the waiter would be back in a little while to take our orders. Hakkai smiled back politely as I started skiming through the menu. Hey, what'd you expect? I was hungry. 

Our decision-making was suddenly interrupted by the sounds of glass cracking and shouts of surprise from a table near us. Apparently, some waiter had tripped over some kid's prank of putting a glass on the floor and the food he had been carrying before flew towards us, barely missing us, but slopping itself right into the empty place on the table in front of us. The glass he was carrying had dropped by him and the child's parents were already scolding the child, various other staff members going up towards him to help him clean up the mess and see if he was okay. We could here the curses flying out of his mouth. That really did look painful since he looked like he barely missed his head hitting a chair. 

Other waiters came over to our table to apologize, cleaning up the mess as soon as possible. Hakkai and I politely replied to them that we were fine, though a bit dirty. I offered my help to the staff to clean our tables, insisting that Hakkai should go to the bathroom to clean up some of the food that splashed on his shirt. He smiled at me and began to get up. 

When he stopped moving, I tugged at his sleeve, barely looking up to see what was wrong, but asking by a familiar touch. When he didn't respond, I had to open my mouth. "Hakkai, what's wrong?" 

"G-G-Gojyo!" 

And sure enough, our myseteriously tripped waiter (who had just picked himself up from the floor) was no other than our old friend, Sha Gojyo. 

I didn't really know what to think at that moment, though I'm pretty sure I said "Hakkai, you lucky bastard."   
  
End Part II   
  
Mwweee....I have to decide on their white collar jobs. And I need to decide how the hell Sanzo's gonna show up. I've only planned how to get Gojyo mixed up more with these two. Sankyuu na to the reviews **Juniper James**, **kitsune-oni**, **gallatica**, **bleit**, **chris37**, and **MoMo**. *bows* I probably should update this more often... 


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